Teeth bared behind false smiles.
Of storms that didn’t pass,
you’re still here.
Watching me unravel.
Cracking open—ugly, cruel, divine.
I didn’t look for you.
Didn’t believe you existed.
Why would I?
A joke the universe plays with a knife pressed to your ribs.
But there you were— twisted enough to stay.
You didn’t come to fix me.
You came to hold me
down, back, open.
You liked the way I rot,
the way I turn into hunger,
the way my mouth says “thank you”
when what I mean is “Fuck me.”
I scream in sleep not from fear, but from the strange delight
of not knowing
My memory frays at the edges.
Maybe that’s a gift.
Maybe forgetting is a mercy.
But not you. you don’t let me forget.
You drag me to the edge.
You kiss me with a knife between the ribs.
You hold me with that terrifying tenderness—
the kind that sees every crack
and wants to fuck the ruin.
Your patience isn’t soft.
It’s deliberate.
Disgustingly disciplined.
it doesn’t flinch when I turn monstrous.
You open your arms and say, “More.”
you came to feed.
my silent confessor,
my grinning devil, brother in madness.
So many have touched this body,this heart, this fire.
And each of them knows the truth:
I am fucking Real.Raw.Ruthless.
Thank you to the ones who didn’t run.
To those who watched me choke down my own shadows
To those who handed me knives,
lit candles and said, “Burn, baby. Burn”
No matter what.
No matter where.
When the blood dries and the bones turn to dust…
I’ll still be here.
Not saved.
Not healed.
But yours.
In ruin.
In rage.
In all my fucking glory.
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